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Joke of the Day
"The shortest distance between two points is over a cyclist. ~Australian drivers, apparently."
Next Joke
"The more fanciful embroidery you have on the back pockets of your jeans, the less I value you as a person."
"Why are there no astronauts on Twitch.tv? Because in space, no one can hear you stream."
"I feel like whoever named it a ""magic marker"" was really overselling their product expectation-wise."
"Why do women get periods? Because they deserve it"
"Its such a shame todays world is so politically correct, you cant even say Black Paint anymore, Instead you have to say ""Leeroy please paint the porch"""
"Why does Snoop Dog always smile like he knows something you don't? Because he's been snooping around."
"What do you call a French whore? Lahore."
"I looked into my partner's eyes and said to the priest, ""I do."" If nobody else was going to object to the marriage, then I guess I had to."
"LPT: Next time you want to tell someone facing you ""my right"" just say left"