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Joke of the Day

"How to properly use a paper clip: 1. Throw in garbage 2. Use a stapler"

"There was a black out in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him."

"A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, ""I slept with a Brazilian...."" The blonde replies, ""Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"""

"What I learned from Titanic was that u need to have sex as soon as possilble with the person u like cause u never know what might happen."

"What happened when the chicken ate cement ? She laid a sidewalk !"

"If I was in the military, I would be a sniper. That way I can lie down a lot."

"Pornography is often frowned upon. But that's only because I'm concentrating."

"People ask me ""Why are you single? You're attractive, intelligent, and have an amazing personality"". My response: ""I'm overqualified""."

"Do not adopt a snow leopard? i did its ruined the sofa, there is shit all over the house,my arms are in ribbons and now i cant find the dog, i think some charities can be downright irresponsible!"

"dont read space facts to try to calm yourself down bc it doesnt work.for example the moon is not round it is shaped like an egg. im furious"