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Joke of the Day

"Coffee is so addicted to me, it can't wait to get in my belly. In its defense, my belly is awesome."

Next Joke
 
"Why can't you use a Palestinian toilet? It's occupied."
"Ive never seen a pregnant Chinese lady."
"Why did the chicken cross the pathway? By doing so, he got to the other side. Romney 2012."
"A doctor goes to his patient and says ""I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's"" Patient replies ""Well, at least I don't have cancer!"""
"Daylight robbery... I got robbed today at Shell gas station. I called the cops, and they asked if I knew who did it. I said, ""Yeah, pump 6."""
"Wanna know my secret to rock hard abs? I ride the mechanical duck outside the grocery store 300 times a day."
"Germany Q1: What would Germany be called had they not surrendered at the end of WW2 ? A1: Gerfew Q2: What would Germany be called if the issue in Q1 happened before the holocaust? A2: Jewmany"
"I need to get baked ...goods for the staff party this afternoon."
"A telemarketer called and said,""can I speak with the man of the house."" I replied, ""sure"" and gave the phone to the cat."
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