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Joke of the Day

"I'm offended by the phrase ""Blood Drive."" I think it's too violent; they should rename it ""Plasma-thon."""

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"Babe Ruth Walks Into a Bar Bartender says ""Why the Long Balls?"
"What do Trees do in Autumn? Take a Leaf of absence."
"BBC News: Being obese can cut your risk of dementia... Hold on, lets rephrase that: ""Fat fuckers are less likely to forget where the biscuits are kept"""
"What did the mailman say when his Mail truck caught fire? That he needed to address the situation"
"""We need a name for this big flat state full of corn and you're gonna be the one to do it"" ""I...uhhh... Wha?"" ""Nailed it. Next state."""
"What's the difference between America and yogurt? If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years, it develops a culture."
"I'm a Chemical Engineer and I have some good Chemistry jokes. ... but I never get a good reaction."
"My Grandfather told me ""Your generation relies too much on technology."" Me: ""No your generation relies too much on technology."" I then pulled out his life support."
"You all know how it got started with Jared right? He walked into a Subway and asked for a sub. They said ""6 or 12?"" He replied with ""doesn't matter."""