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Joke of the Day

"Just got the new Windows... ... such a pane"

"Just changed my dating profile headline to: ""Seeking rich old men with bad hearts and no relatives"" ...crossing my fingers"

"Sorry I called you stupid. It was insensitive and heartless of me. I just assumed that you knew."

"Two peanuts were walking down the street.. And one of them was assaulted."

"I'm thankful for the Buffalo Soldiers who fought tirelessly for our chicken wings."

"When is the best time to hold a funeral? In the mourning. FYI, my 11yo says he made this up today, right after learning of death in the extended family."

"The clear history button in your browser has saved more lives than Superman."

"What do you call a punch-drunk Japanese person whose father has diarrhea? A slap-happy Jappy with a crap-happy pappy! I'll show myself out..."

"Genie: 1st wish ME: I wish for a pen G: #2 M: another pen G: wtf M: I already lost the 1st pen G: and ur 3rd M: ur not going to believe this"

"A man walk into a doctors room with a frog hanging out of his ear. ""What on Earth happened?"" The doctor said, surprised. ""I don't know, it started with a boil on my arse."" the frog said."