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Joke of the Day

"There should be a ""Life of Pi"" TV show, where they throw a different D-list celebrity in a boat with a tiger every week."

"Today sucked so much it featured a guest verse from Pitbull"

"If you want your dog to take a pill: 1. Get a piece of cheese 2. Eat the cheese for energy 3. Get ready to wrestle your dog"

"95% of every relationship is navigating the question ""Where should we eat?"" without it turning into World War III."

"Where do polar bears go to deposit money? A snowbank"

"I did a random survey/poll on the street and according to 98% of people, ""Leave me alone""!"

"The Buddhist Mafia is called Karma."

"Today is Steve Irwin day... Good ol' Steve, he even died with animals in his heart."

"A black man and his donkey walk into a bar.. The bartender says ""get your black ass outta here."""

"[praying in church] Please God let church end early"