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Joke of the Day

"HER: I don't know what you'd do without me. ME: HER: Please stop imagining all those things. ME: Ok."

"Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire."

"So I was peeing in the pool yesterday. The lifeguard hollered so loud, I almost fell in!"

"What do you call immigrants to Sweden? Ugly."

"You're so ugly, Scorpion be like, ""Stay over there!"""

"I like writing my own chemistry jokes... Because the only good ones Argon."

"My wife says I have a drinking problem.. I don't remember ever getting blackout drunk though."

"What do you call a group of animals who decides to kill themselves? Mass zooicide."

"Why are Skeleton's so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin."

"Throughout history they've removed a lot of key parts from the bible, like how Satan nicknamed his loofah ""Loofifer."""