115197
Joke of the Day
"So a baby seal walks into a club..."
Next Joke
"How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the pyschopath"
"I thought I was electrocuted. But in a shocking twist, I survived. . . . Try the Veal."
"Fun DIY Project Even YOU Can Do Step 1: Flip over empty wine bottle Step 2: Use base as weapon"
"My dad is in the hospital, he needed to get some toes amputated because of his diabetes. He's been good about it. He says he's lactose intolerant."
"Don't ever look away from a police officer. Just stare him down. You don't wanna look suspicious."
"I'm not lazy... I'm just on my energy saving mode."
"I might invent a new beer, call it ""Occasionally"". When people ask if I drink, I can say I drink Occasionally' this way they won't think i'm an alcoholic."
"Setting a teachers salary based on student performance is akin to paying a zookeeper based on how well the monkeys are behaving."
"If you can tell from my eye contact at the grocery store that I'm inviting you to race shopping carts, you're my kinda people."