115196

Joke of the Day

"toothpaste is a big scam. if ur tooth falls out, it stays out. toothpaste Will Not paste it back in."

"I hear Adrian Peterson is getting into baseball... Apparently he's a great switch hitter."

"'I like mouse but I couldn't eat a whole one' - Our sodding cat"

"What's black and slides down Nelson's column? Winnie Mandela."

"So Helen Keller walks into a bar . . . . . . then she walks into a table, she knocks over a lamp, barks her shins on the ottoman, spills a drink . . . it's fine I'll show myself out."

"I recently got a job circumcising elephants the pay is terrible but the TIPS ARE HUGE!"

"You know you're getting fat when.. The clothes section you shop in has chairs spread out incase you get winded."

"Pick a number, double it, add 10, divide it by 2, then minus it by the number you started with. LIKE if you got 5."

"""70% of the people don't know how to use the superlative degree in English"" That's the most stupidest thing that I've ever heard."

"What were the photocopier's last words? Good night, sweet prints..."