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Joke of the Day

"I hope I don't catch another weirdo pooping against the side of a 7-11 tomorrow because I'm not ready to love again."

Next Joke
 
"I'm at my most fake news when I tell my husband how much money I spent shopping."
"Why did the music student have a piano in the bathroom? Because he was practicing Handel's Water Music."
"4-year-old: What do you want for your birthday? Me: You could get me a ""world's best dad"" mug. 4: You told me not to lie."
"For those of you wondering what it's like to be married, I'm on day 3 of an argument I didn't know I was having."
"An eskimo was showing another eskimo pictures of his house... ... The other eskimo said ""That's an ice picture!""."
"Did someone say ""purple""? Sorry, it must have been a pigment of my imagination!"
"What is Mexico's national sport? Cross country."
"I met this guy named Times New Roman... But he just wasn't my type."
"How to Pass So apparently if someone commits suicide while we take a exam or final in school, everyone in that room or place will get 100%. I literally need the blood of a virgin to pass these exams."