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Joke of the Day

"Hey, courtroom artists. If you think the guy sounds guilty, draw an eye patch or scar. This isn't photography."

"I found a new recipe that's fat free, gluten free, sugar free, dairy free, preservative-free and is non-GMO. It's a real breath of fresh air."

"The reason why I am single. Watching batman vs superman with gf. Suddenly wonder women's entry, instant boner. Gf ask wtf is that. I replied dark knight rises"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side."

"How do you kill a redneck? Wait until he fucks his sister and then cut the brakes on his house."

"Do you like snow? Yes Or Snow"

"Me: I wish Inigo Montoya appeared everytime ""literally"" is misused and did his ""You keep saying that word"" bit Genie: That ones on the house"

"What do vegetarian zombies eat? GRAAAAAAAAAAINS!!"

"Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A: Got stuck in a trap chewed off three legs and was still stuck."

"How was copper wire first invented? Two Jews were fighting over a penny."