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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Two. One to change it and another one to change it back again."

"NSFW How do you know when a girl is too young for you? When you have to make airplane noises to get your cock in her mouth. Source: Jimmy Carr"

"Every day, hundreds of seals are clubbed to death by hunters. It's snow joke."

"Q: What do teddy bears like to have in their houses? A: Fur-niture."

"You're not allowed to tweet screenshots of chats where you're the one who says the funny thing."

"""Doctor"" said the patient ""I need help! I can't stop acting like a cat!"" ""How long have you had this problem?"" the doctor asked. ""Lest's see"" said the patient ""Mom had the litter in '41"

"Before you refer to someone as your ex, make sure they know you dated."

"Did you hear about the Egyptian boatman who refused to believe his craft was sinking? He was in denial"

"""Don't fret."" -Guitar that apparently doesn't want to be played"

"An Asian woman brings her large Irish boyfriend to meet her traditional parents Her mother says: ""You bring great Shamus to this family."""