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Joke of the Day

"Went to a parade. For an hour, bored people on floats waved. For an hour, My 2-year-old waved back. It was the greatest day of her life."

"What did the one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing they just waved! Did you sea what I did there? I'm shore you did, beach."

"If you loiter in a Tibetan spiritual leaders sandwich shop every day, then you dilly dally in the Dalai's deli daily."

"'Find a guy who ruins your lipstick, not your mascara ' lol mate ruin any part of my makeup nd ur gettin smacked down"

"What gets higher with age? Willie Nelson"

"The Navy should develop something based on ""gaydar"" that would allow ships & planes to recognize approaching objects."

"How do you get a baby into a shoebox? A. With a blender. Q. How do you get a baby out of a shoebox? A. With a straw."

"A Japanese commander invites Darth Vader to dinner He asks him "" Will you be there tonight at 8 PM Lord Vader?"" Vader says "" I hope so commander, for your sake ""."

"Strange trend at my office... People are naming food in the break room refrigerator. Today I ate a sandwich named ""Kevin""."

"What do you calla nosy pepper? Jalapeno business"