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Joke of the Day

"And then one day we decided we were tired of sleeping in and doing whatever we wanted whenever we wanted in a clean house, and we had kids."

"Clearly cheating A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly. Lorraine dies suddenly. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, ""I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."""

"I'm not comfortable with the fact that there's a skeleton inside me."

"A 79 year old pirate has his next birthday this morning.... he wakes up and says to his crew, ""AYE-matey!"""

"Iron Man is technically a FEmale. I will downvote myself on the way out...."

"A light joke. So I had this crazy dream where I weighed less than a thousandth a gram. Yeah I was like 0mg!"

"What's the difference between an erection and a Camaro? I don't have a Camaro...."

"What do you call a sad hat? A sombre-ero!"

"Where does the little king keep his little armies? Up his little sleevies."

"Minnie Mouse comes home to Mickey and tells him she wants to get a divorce Mickey: ""What? Think of what this will do to the ratings! Are you fucking crazy!?"" Minnie: ""No dear, I'm fucking Goofy"""