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Joke of the Day

"""this wing of the facility is where we do updog research"" ""what's updog"" ""that's what we're trying to determine"""

"When a woman says ""fine"" what she really means is ""I'm going to say things are fine but they really aren't and I will later throw it back in your face."

"New York, ""Darling, can I go out in this dress?"" ""Yes dear, it's already dark out."""

"*family meeting at Noah's house* who wants us to do what by when?"

"While it paints me to say this... I'm really not much of an artist."

"bury me in a dog park so i can be some dogs treasure"

"How do you know if you are having a good time? When you throw your knickers against the wall, and they stay there."

" : - , - , . - ! ... aneki.kz : - , ! ! - ? - , ?! ! 45 !"

"I love the way the earth rotates. It really makes my day."

"A black man and his donkey walk into a bar.. The bartender says ""get your black ass outta here."""