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Joke of the Day

"What does Pikachu say when he puts too much salsa on his food? PIKA PIKA PIKA (Credit to my 5 year old son)"

"Now the Supreme Court has ruled that corporations are legally a person with rights, there are a lot of rape charges I'm filing against them."

"What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish? Two very unhappy animals."

"Who do you get if you cross Arnold Schwarzenegger with Michael Jackson? Michael Wasanigger"

"A vaping hipster aetheist vegan crossfitter walks into a bar just kidding people like that dont exist but I imagine they do so I have someone to hate other than myself haha."

"What do you call a boat that won't float? Bloated."

"The definition of agony is... A one handed man hanging on to a cliff for his dear life with itchy balls."

"Do you know how old I am? I'm so old that I was around when the Dead Sea was just sick. (Told to me by my grandfather)"

"It's actually a good thing money doesn't grow on trees because I've killed every plant I've ever owned."

"Why did the gynecologist giggle during the pap smear? I don't know. It was an inside joke."