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Joke of the Day

"The ""Blind People Alphabet"" A, B, D, E, F..."

"Sometimes I think I have the worst job in the world... ... and then I remember there are people who work in PR for Comcast."

"Why did the can crusher hate his job? Because it was soda pressing"

"No thanks Cupid. If I wanted butterflies and my heart skipping beats, I would do something less ridiculous like lose my phone."

"My Girlfriend Told Me I Need To Get In Shape..... I told her ""I am in shape! Round is a shape!"""

"*Takes drive down memory lane *Gets a DUI"

"Batman: Why so down? Aquaman: People think I'm not a real superhero. I'm tired of being walked all over. *[Jesus enters] Aquaman: Dammit!"

"Q: Why does Father Time wear bandages? A: Because day breaks and night falls."

"A mushroom walks into a bar... A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says ""whoa there, little guy! Didn't you see the sign? No mushrooms allowed!"" The mushroom says ""why not?! I'm a fun guy!"""

"What is Michael Bay's favorite move in chess? C4"