112692
Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil..."
Next Joke
"You know you're not a Harry Potter fan if: you think a parcel-tongue is someone who can speak to packages."
"How many communists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, we just sit in the dark complaining about capitalism. But come the light-bulb revolution everything will be brighter."
"What separates the men from the boys in the Catholic Church? A condom."
"If you surround your house in police tape, the odds of you being robbed drops dramatically."
"What's gray and comes in quarts? Elephants."
"My catchphrase is ""Just smell the money, baby"". I can't use it yet (I don't have money), please don't steal it"
"Dozing off during Sportscenter and waking up an hour later in the same clip is every guy's version of Memento."
"I don't need a calendar to tell me winter is approaching *strokes wife's leg hair*"
"You won't drink away the alcoholism."