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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why do cats like to hear other cats make noise? - A: It's meow-sic to their ears!"

"I went to a charity event for women who lost their legs, when someone stole all of their wheelchairs. After that, the place was crawling with pussy"

"Breaking - Trump emailed Hillary Clinton his tax returns She just accidentally deleted them."

"I thought I was drowning in an ocean of orange soda yesterday.... It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea."

"The band 1024 Megabytes is coming to town. It's their first gig."

"PEOPLE OF THE PLANE LISTEN TO ME WHEN THE SEATBELT LIGHT GOES OFF STAND UP IMMEDIATELY OR YOUR SPOT IN THE NON-MOVING LINE WON'T BE ASSURED"

"Just installed an egg cannon on the hood of my car. Flipping people off and cursing at them just doesn't satisfy me anymore."

"I said, should we go to my place? She said, ""Come to my house tomorrow, no ones gonna be home. "" I went to her house. No one was there."

"Donald Trump is still running for president because it is the only race he hasn't offended yet."

"True intimacy is chatting within a shared Google Doc"