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Joke of the Day

"How do you want it die? Personally, i want to go out as my grandpa. Peacefully in his sleep. Unlike his passengers, screaming and crying."

"My elephants got no trunk ? How does it smell ? Terrible !"

"[Giraffe Weatherman] ""Yes Bob, we have a major blizzard happening up here but *giraffe lowers head* on the ground we're still looking good."""

"What happened when the man couldn't afford the mortgage on his haunted house? ...it was repossessed!"

"They named a cricket tournament after my friend's grandfather. They call it the ashes for a reason."

"What do you call someone who can't find a job? A Psych major. (Pls list your own response - if you're awake and in America at this time, you should have a pretty good one). Thanks."

"Why do migits laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls."

"Excuse me, but do you like whales? (yeah, why) Cause I was thinking that we could ""humpback"" at my place."

"How to become a Saint 1: Become Catholic 2: Live an exemplary and pious life 3: Perform at least two miracles Or...Just Be Kanye's baby"

"30 cows, 28 chicken. how many didn't? 10"