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Joke of the Day
"What happens if a line doesn't get enough Vitamin C? It gets curvy."
Next Joke
"Wife: Your life insurance premium paid up? Me: Yeah. Wife: Good. Me: Why? Wife: No reason. Me: ... Wife: ... Me: ... Wife: Here, taste this."
"Two praying mantis' sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I Oh shit, did you see that? Daaaamn. She straight up ate him."
"How many ska kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? One to drop it and six to pick it up pick it up pick it up"
"There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men: ""don't"" and ""stop""."
"I just saw a guy with leather pants get out of an IROC-Z. I wanted to say ""Welcome to the future, traveler. You're going to love it here!"""
"What did the the physiatrist say to the electron You have a lot of negative energy built up"
"My girlfriend and I are having a disagreement. She wants a huge wedding with 500 guests and a piano player... I want us to see other people."
"Why did Lionel go to the medical store? because it was pharmacy."
"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly this dick in your mouth."