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Joke of the Day

"I was having sex with this woman for 10 minutes before I realized it was a man, and then for like 20 minutes after."

"9 years ago i asked the girl of my dreams out on a date, today i asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"What was the Preacher turned Drill Seargent's favorite command? Present Alms!"

"My girlfriend's body is like poetry... ...It bores me. *I really love my girlfriend, and her body is not like poetry, just so ya know :p"

"I only support ghost hunting if you need the ghost for food."

"I lose my White friends in the snow, I lose my Black friends at night, I lose my Asian friends in the sand, where do I lose my Arab friends? In an explosion."

"*bullies advance* STOP! Im a black belt in Shaq Fu! <laughter> *detectives arrive* Jesus, were these heads slam-dunked? Where r the bodies?"

"Why do men get erections while they sleep? So they don't accidentally roll out of bed."

"What does the cabbage merchant use to fix his cabbages? A cabbage patch! - Sokka"

"A wife is like a box of chocolates, you never know which of her multiple moods you're going to get, you just better act like you love it."