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Joke of the Day

"A blind man once told me, he smokes a lot because ... he got nothing to 'look' forward. Well, let just say that I 'see' his point......Ba Dum Tss!!!"

"Did you hear about the scarecrow who won an Oscar? He was out standing in his field."

"A man approaches a prostitute ""how much for a blow job?"" ""$30"" ""Can you do 20?"" ""sure"" ""Great here's $600"""

"What do you get if you cross a bee with a parrot? An animal that's always telling you how busy it is!"

"If you ever struggle to make your woman happy, just remember Eve was in the Garden of Eden and it wasn't good enough."

"What do you call a mountain of puns? Mount Cleverest"

"Q: Where do Sith Lords shop? A: At Darth Mall."

"So what do you do for a living? ""I'm in the Secret Service"" Wow, you didn't keep that secret too well did you"

"*wakes up w/phone in hand* Me:[texting] Sorry I fell asleep on ya last night *text chime* Couch: I'm like right here why are you texting me?"

"A man with a sheep A man goes home with a sheep under his arm and says ""this is the pig I've been fucking."" His wife says "" that's not a pig, that's a sheep."" The man says ""I wasn't talking to you."""