111831

Joke of the Day

"I was touched when my slutty ex-girlfriend said she got a tattoo for me, but it turned out to be a heart with the name ""Occupant."""

"I have a great relation ship with Jesus He mows my lawn for $6 an hour"

"What will reddit never know? Victoria's Secret..."

"Do you sell hot dogs? Because you know how to make a wiener stand."

"Go ahead lady, call the cops. I have witnesses that say your toddler started it."

"Damn, girl, are you Terms and Conditions? Because I just want to blindly agree to whatever you say."

"I recently bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer... I dunno what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day!"

"Where do all the bad hamburger buns live? In the seedy part of town"

"How did the Manicurist feel after her salon was robbed? Defiled."

"What's the difference between Jews and Pizzas? Pizzas don't scream in the oven. *Preparing self For the downvotes/Report*"