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Joke of the Day

"Do you sell hot dogs? Because you know how to make a wiener stand."

"What do you call a broke actor? Johnny Debt."

"Ok people, I think the big take away from 2016 is that it's really bad luck to start the year by shooting a gorilla"

"Said this at dinner last night. Bit creepy, but laughs were had. ""He may die a virgin but he ain't gonna be buried one."""

"Your love is like Vicodin. You take away my pain but make me sick to stomach afterwards and you're also white."

"In 'One Really Long Metal Claw' (the bear version of 'Hook'), what did Captain Onereallylongmetalclaw really hate? Clawcks."

"theres a train nerd counting the number of ppl that get on and off at every stop. at first i pitied him but he seems happy so now i hate him"

"What's a tents favorite kind of meat? Stakes"

"What do you call a root vegetable that spins on it's axis? A *rotato*..."

"What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt"