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Joke of the Day

"I know it's 3 meals a day,,,,,, But how many at night?"

"How many gnomes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the two, really. Or as many as will fit, if theyre feeling frisky."

"Without context, where would we be? Joke is the title. If you don't get it, think about it a bit."

"What's Alex's (from 'A Clockwork Orange') preferred type of light? Ultraviolent"

"Some people are like base model cars, you can see the spots where all the normal stuff should be, but it's just never been installed."

"First person ever: I HAVE SEVERAL HOLES IN MY FACE WHAT IS HAPPENING"

"What do you call a lazy sandstone? A sedentary rock."

"Bees aren't disappearing. Trump has been secretly deporting them because he thinks pollination is a hoax created by the Chinese."

"Why did Bill Clinton sign the NAFTA agreement? [NSFW] He loves a giant sucking sound."

"I wanna get HAMMERED tonight. Seriously? Yeah, drunk as hell, bro. Riiight. Of course, of course. *quietly slides hammer back into sleeve*"