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Joke of the Day

"What is the oldest joke we have on record? (X-post) http://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/2krnv8/what_is_the_oldest_joke_we_have_on_record/"

"How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? Nine. One to change the light bulb, and eight to beat the room for being dark."

"One thing won't change for Jared Fogle while in prison He will still be eating 6"" to 12"" daily."

"I installed a pedometer app on my phone But whichever direction I walk, I seem to be moving away from the kids."

"I know its not Christmas, but Santa's lap is always ready."

"Boss: Where were you born? Santa : India. Boss: which part? Santa : What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India."

"In the US the best men of all are called ""bros."" In the UK, it's ""lads."" Either way, they're both thoughtful, selfless & fun to be around."

"FINISH THE SENTENCE!!! I woke up in a ditch and...."

"Customer: ""It says I've performed an illegal operation and will be shut down. Have I done something wrong?"""

"What has a hazelnut in every bite? SQUIRREL SHIT!"