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Joke of the Day

"I'm really confused by the fact people judge me for refusing to pay for Netflix... I mean, I've seen Stranger Things."

"I like my woman just like my muffin I prefer the top and never eat the bottom."

"What is a pirates favourite part of a fish? The aye"

"What does one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they're both stuck up bitches"

"Bears spend a bunch of time getting fat, sleep for a few months and then wake up skinny. Being a human is terrible."

"No, I don't want to ""Like"" your business on Facebook. I barely ""Like"" you."

"What do thanksgiving dinner and the refugee crisis in Europe have in common? Turkey and grease"

"Any salad is a caesar salad if you stab it enough. Repost from r/showerthoughts"

"How does the KKK celebrate gay pride? With a LGBBQ."

"[at ER] ME: my stomach hurts. DOC: have you been able to eat anything today? ME: yeah, like 75 pieces of pizza."