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Joke of the Day
"What does one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they're both stuck up bitches"
Next Joke
"Interviewer: Your resume only has ""Mad"" under ""Skills"" Me: Yeah boyee Interviewer: *tears up* You're just what we need. Welcome to Subway."
"Which is more threatening? A big sword or a small sword? The small sword - it's a little rapier"
"General Contractor: Don't worry ma'am, everything will be ready, we'll have the scaffolding set up and erected. Me: *mutes phone* hahahahaha"
"How do you confuse a gay person? Seven"
"According to a new report from BP, the earth will run out of oil in 53 years. Luckily, thanks to BP, the ocean will still have plenty..."
"Taming Wild Cats by Claude Face"
"My office got a shredder, so now I have to buy a turtle costume to fight it on Monday. Work is hard."
"Can I seriously not read Dr. Seuss books for free online? Very well. To my local library it is. #FreeVideosOfChicksEatingPooButNotFreeBooks?"
"How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. German light bulbs don't break."