110989

Joke of the Day

"Treat your women like your smartphone; touch them a lot."

"What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros? Elephino"

"I used to think I'd never be able to be president because I'm a woman but now I know it's because I don't like drinking water"

"How many contortionists fit in the trunk of a regular sedan? Depends on the size of the pieces."

"God has no Phone, but I talk to him. He has no Facebook, but he is still my friend. He does not have a Twitter, but I still follow him."

"Why do dwarfs laugh will running ? Because the grass tickles their balls !!"

"When someone invites me to their house and I see more than 2 cars parked outside it I keep driving just in case it's an intervention for me"

"I hate when I forget to shave then people assume I'm a hippy and start talking about recycling."

"I wanted to crack a joke on cooking utensils... ...but it didn't pan out."

"Why is 'dark' spelled with a k and not with c? Because you can't see in the dark Badambum!"