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Joke of the Day

"I used to think I'd never be able to be president because I'm a woman but now I know it's because I don't like drinking water"

"Him: you're terrifying Me: awww you're just saying that"

"My mate Sid was a victim of I.D theft. He's just called S now."

"Osama Bin Laden tried his hand as a movie reviewer before settling on global terrorism... Unfortunately, he always gave films the same rating: 9/11."

"Accidentally dropped a magic mushroom in my cats litter box & now he's laying across the driveway staring at the stars & quoting Kierkegaard"

"It's 2023, a child asks her father ""how did Donald Trump get elected?"" "".....that was the year all the adults were busy coloring."""

"If at first you don't succeed... ...keep on sucking until you suck seed."

"i did it God! i finaly got 2 of evry animal NOAH.THEY HAVE TO BE ALIVE *noah looks at boat full of dead animals* do u kno how long this took"

"When I found out my girlfriend was having a baby my life really changed. specifically my name, address and phone number."

"What did the baker say when he saw the beautiful woman? ""I think I'm in loaf."" Ba dum, tss."