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Joke of the Day

"I wanted to crack a joke on cooking utensils... ...but it didn't pan out."

"What do you call a dead bee? A was."

"If someone dies from laced cocaine, does the coroner write ""devastating blow"" on the death certificate?"

"Have you seen www.usedmatch.com? Yes but I didn't find it striking."

"This pumpkin spice toilet paper seems unnecessary, but I'll taste it nonetheless."

"How many gears does a French battle tank have? Five. Four in reverse, and one in case the enemy is attacking from the rear."

"What's the difference between a retard and a baby? The baby has a soul."

"Oh my god, hotels. Relax. My stay was fine."

"Why did the feminist burn down the field of canola? She said she was defending herself against rape."

"""Make it look like I live in a Cheesecake Factory."" - NBA players to their interior designers"