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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between my bike and your mom? Your dad doesn't watch when I ride my bike."

"Why were the boy and girl melons depressed? Because they can't elope."

"So Mickey Mouse is in a lawyer's office. The lawyer says ""So you say you want to divorce your wife because she's crazy?"". Micky Mouse replies ""No, I said she's fucking Goofy!"""

"Why are there no cats on mars? Curiosity"

"Billion dollar idea: Tea bags that are actually wine bags. Slogan: You already act like you're God, now turn water into wine like Jesus!"

"""And then we'll have the throat hole open up and a rectangle candy will drop from it. Kids will love it."" ~ Inventors of Pez dispensers."

"I'm thinking of starting a business will use free child labor in exchange for temporary housing. Although I don't know if I can compete with the Girl Scouts..."

"What did the bread say when it was about have an orgasm? (NSFW) What did the bread say when it was about to have an orgasm? ""I'm Crumbing"""

"Why do lesbians have cats? They're into pussies.(;"

"I was at a barbecue party when a cow from a nearby farm charged me and chased me into a corner It was at that moment I realized my life was at steak"