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Joke of the Day

"Anonymity on the internet allows us to be whatever we want to be, but I'm glad most of us went with ""perverted idiot""."

"Learning someone led a double life would hard to process because yes, they betrayed you, but wow, think about those organizational skills"

"Why wasn't the geologist hungry? He lost his apatite. I know that joke has its faults, so I'll just accept my pumicement and go back to looking at cleavage."

"What did the hipster say the day after thanksgiving? I liked the leftovers before they were cool."

"If I were black... I'd stand in front of a tanning salon and laugh at all the customers. Source: Neal Brennan"

"WARNING: Racist What do you call a black person on the moon? A problem What do you call all black people on the moon? A solution"

"I'm going to name my son Red so he'll grow up to be a wise sportswriter or the prison inmate who knows how to get things. Hopefully both."

"Hey girl, are you a tube of Pringles? Because my whole fist is stuck inside of you"

"Why is it awful to be an egg? You only get laid once, it takes three minutes to get hard, and you come in a box with eleven others."

"If there's a pistachio that's difficult to open, I'll just move right on to another because life is short and so is my god damn temper"