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Joke of the Day
"As a Jew, I refuse to enter any steam room or sauna until I've seen other people come out."
Next Joke
"[ouija board] ""Spirits are u there? I A M H E R E. Y O U W A N N A T A L K? Y O U W A N N A H A N G O U T? [squints] ""A needy board?"""
"""Everyone give us money in case something happens and when something happens we'll call you a liar."" -insurance"
"[Wildebeest being lowered Mission Impossible-style from a helicopter to graze the grasses of Buckingham Palace]"
"What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? A: Snowballs."
"*Brings axe to slumber party* ""Oops. I thought you said 'lumber party'"" *Knew the whole time* *Waits until they're asleep* *Chops down tree*"
"What is the strongest animal? A racehorse because it can take hundreds of people for a ride at once!"
"Due to a tragic ""iTunes on shuffle"" incident, I have had to convince the guys at work that I have a 12yr old daughter they have never met..."
"What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter it wont come anyways"
"What's the difference between an American and a Briton? Britons think 200 miles is a long distance, and American's think 200 years is a long time."