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Joke of the Day

"Do you know; what is the best thing to put on a delicious cake? Your MOUTH!"

"What organ in the body never dies? THE LIVER. ometrist will copyright this joke. hopefully."

"I wanted to build a camp for kids with ADD. But I got shut down for calling it a concentration camp."

"It's nice that lions don't mind looking like 80's rock stars."

"If I played Edward Scissor Hands in paper, rock, scissors every once in a while I'd throw a paper in there so he wouldn't feel too bad."

"Where's a lesbian's favorite place to shop? The Liquor store"

"I believe that every person has a story to tell...which is why I stay at home."

"With Vladimir Putin so eager to restore ties, I think the U.S and Russia should form one country. We can call it The United States of Soviet Russia! USSR for short."

"My dog: wasn't me Me: I know My dog: honest It wasn't me Me: it's ok really My dog: [chip packet still on her head] I think the kid ate them"

"What does Pittsburgh have in common with Peter Pan? The Pirates always lose."