144024

Joke of the Day

"With Vladimir Putin so eager to restore ties, I think the U.S and Russia should form one country. We can call it The United States of Soviet Russia! USSR for short."

Next Joke
 
"My wife's hot best friend just sent me an email with the subject line: ""Date Night."" I'm just going to stop there and imagine the rest."
"The patient was about to die ""Well,"" said the doctor, ""He can wait."""
"Why does Santa have such a beautiful garden? He is always Hoe-hoe-hoeing."
"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles!"
"WIFE: you've had enough ME (eating my 68th breadstick): aw man OLIVE GARDEN MANAGER: let him eat one more lol"
"Just got my free yearly car wash Thanks California!"
"Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer... Too bad he has never cried."
"How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to change a lightbulb? They don't change it. They just watch it burn out, then follow it around for another 15 years."
"[kung fu fight] ""Your tiger claw is no match for my crane."" *starts lifting heavy building materials*"