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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead lawyer on the road? The dead cat has skid marks around it."

"What do you call a multiple choice dad joke? A pop quiz."

"How do you get an elephant into a Safeway grocery bag? You take the ""S"" out of safe and the ""F"" out of way. One of my all time faves. If you say it out loud it will make sense :D"

"Where does Justin Timberlake go swimming when he's in the Ukraine? The Crimea River"

"What do you call a blind deer? No Idea. (Hopefully you will get it, repeat twice if you have to) Edit: In case you don't get it, its No Eye Deer. [No Idea]"

"""Maybe like a tiny bed for your face."" - pillow pitch meeting"

"Did you know that in any given group, only 9/10 of people understand basic math? The other 3% doesn't."

"Why would someone name a dog ""pistachio""? Because they're nuts"

"Why are redneck murders so hard to solve? Because all the DNA matches and there's no dental records."

"Why did the bald man put a rabbit on his head? Because he wanted a head of hare (hair)."