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Joke of the Day

"Why should you avoid people dressed as celery? They could be stalking you!"

"How did the Hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool"

"i thought eyelashes were meant to keep shit out of your eye but half the time theres anything in my eye its a fucking eyelash"

"I failed my drivers license test I didn't want to start the car. When the instructor asked why I said it was illegal to test and drive."

"Three nuns are sitting on a park bench when a flasher comes by and opens his trench coat. The first two nuns each had a stroke. The third nun couldn't reach."

"What did Bill Cosby say in response to his rape allegations? Kids say the darndest things."

"Did you hear about the farmer who fell in love with his cows milk? It was his significant udder"

"I wish there was a sarcasm font so people could read my humour and not be offended."

"Stumbled upon my sister's porn while on the family computer That's the last time I google her name..."

"why are Asians so smart? because they get alot of brain"