109433

Joke of the Day

"Whose bad idea was it to text him a 4th time just in case his phone was being weird? Tequila, I'm looking at you."

"What's the most difficult thing about roller-blading? Telling your parents that you are a faggot!"

"What do you call a Jewish cop? Kosher Pork."

"Whenever I read the phrase ""We've changed our privacy policy,"" I just shrug and assume they already have pictures of me on the toilet."

"What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? ""See you next month!"""

"Why does the boss put clocks under employee's desk? Because he wanted them to work over-time~"

"A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest turns to the rabbi and says, ""Hey, did you hear the one about us doing this?"""

"Why did simba's father die in a stampede??? Because he couldn't mufasa!!!"

"Her: You have very beautiful hair. Me: Oh, you flirt! *Hands me her card* Her: If you're ever thinking about selling it, call me..."

"I wanted to make a joke about a bridge but I thought I might need to build the suspense first"