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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever had sex while camping? It's in tents."

"So we no longer say ""please"" and ""thanks"" in the office? Never got the memo. But I did get one saying it's ok to key impolite people's cars."

"Where does a guru get his sandwiches? New Delhi"

"For someone so concerned with marriage licenses, God sure was focused on dinosaurs for 180 million years."

"Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes."

"Who is this Rorschach guy.... ... and why does he paint all these pictures of my parents fighting?"

"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that..."

"I think someone may be sending me death threats. Woke up this morning with a [Tesco burger](http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-21038521) on my pillow!"

"What do a 9 volt battery and a woman's asshole have in common? You know you don't want to, but eventually you are going to lick them both"

"I'm a man who hates rocks *smashes a rock with a sledgehammer* oh great I just made like a thousand more rocks"