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Joke of the Day

"[Friend opens Christmas present] Me: It's a lie detector Friend: Oh... I love it Me: (whispering) we'll see"

"Dark Jokes are like food. Not everyone gets it."

"What happened when the car took LSD? It went on a road trip and had an auto body experience!"

"""Hi, I'd like a Junior McChicken and a cheeseburger please."" ""$3.23."" ""Oh, and a bottle of water."" ""$87.54. Please drive thru."""

"I was going to make a dubstep joke But I'll just drop it."

"Diner: May I please have a glass of water? Waiter: Why are you thirsty? Diner: No I want to see if my neck leaks."

"What do the Superbowl and the OJ Simpson Saga have in common? They both feature a slow, old, white bronco."

"I'm always creeped out by the guy who seems to know the age of consent laws a little too well."

"I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've tripping all day."

"The Fish Net Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann? A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl."