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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a flea circus? From scratch."

"What did the zoo keeper say when he saw four elephants walking over the hill towards him wearing sunglasses? Nothing he didn't recognize them!"

"""Age is just a number"" ...so is your credit score, your weight, the balance in your bank account"

"I don't think a single person at the office noticed that I shaved off my mustache. All I heard all day long was, ""Where are your pants?"""

"What does eating a chick out and being in the mob have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit."

"He stole my heart, so I stole his last name. Is the slogan of a very famous body parts and new ID shop in Mexico."

"Nic Cage was a straight A highschool student but he slacked off one semester. When he got his report card, he shouted ""Bs! Not the Bs!"""

"To use Google efficiently, write like Tarzan. ""good tacos boston"""

"I really hope it's a typo on your resume where it says you're ""goat oriented""."

"New boyfriend is allergic to kitten so can't keep him :( He's ginger & named Tom. Friendly. Comes when called. 28yrs-old & works in IT."