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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear that Shakira and Madonna had a big fight? They're no longer on a first-name basis."

"A snowstorm knocked out the power of a black man's house, so he went out to investigate. He's the only blackout in a whiteout."

"Why should you not argue with a decimal? Because decimals always have a point."

"I wouldn't step onto a plane with thrust issues."

"[in hip-hop voice] uh"

"life is just a series of people giving up on you til your body gives up too but yeah sure, I'll bring my famous guacamole to the baby shower"

"What do you call 12 guys with big dicks? A hung jury"

"How many Egalitarians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Doesn't matter, they'll just screw it one rotation one way and one rotation the other way and call it equality."

"What sort of shoes to ninjas wear? Sneakers."

"I went to the store to get six cans of sprite... ...But when I got home I discovered that I'd picked 7-up."