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Joke of the Day
"I can't wait to see the new movie, ""Constipation"" Unfortunately it hasn't come out yet."
Next Joke
"*becomes suddenly aware of the overwhelming amount of beauty and horror in the world and the brief second in time we exist on it* what the"
"Dear future self, No, you weren't robbed. You left your house like this. Sincerely, You, you dumb slob."
"I'm having a lot of difficulty with knitting Oops, wrong thread."
"I tried crossbreeding my cows. I was attempting to create a new type of milk that was super sweet. Instead, none of the cows would even produce milk. It was a complete and udder failure."
"What do fish smoke? Seewead"
"Who's the coolest guy at the hospital? The ultra sound guy."
"If a grandpa has a child with his granddaughter he's a great grandpa... but a horrible father."
"What do you call a leper in a hot tub? Soup"
"I'd like to execute g0d. But how can you execute vacuum."