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Joke of the Day

"How did OJ respond when his son asked to borrow the car? >Only if you go aks your mother."

"Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car? So they can park in the handicapped spot."

"5+5=6 -5+6=-12 10+10=200 no joke"

"How does the farmer count up his cows? ...with a cowculator."

"The reward for a job well done is more work."

"[at bar] Gee, I'm so hungry I could eat a horse *nearby horse slams down his whisky* COME ON THEN TOUGH GUY *horse throws the 1st punch*"

"Taylor Swift seems like one of those chicks who thinks it's cute to put her bare feet on the dashboard of a car when riding shotgun."

"Me: why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie Surgeon: wtf M: he was too far out man S: how are you still awake we heavily sedated you"

"Women freeze their eggs until they are ready to be a mom? Can I freeze my two year old until I'm ready?"

"Best time to watch German rape porn? Nein! Ooooo nein!"