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Joke of the Day

"How does the farmer count up his cows? ...with a cowculator."

"What kind of fish loves to fix instruments? A tuna."

"I gave up viagra It was hard at first..."

"License and registration please. ""Bears."" Excuse me? ""Beaaaaars."" Are you drunk sir? ""BEAAAARS!"" Stop saying bea- *cop is mauled by bears*"

"How do you say ""bra"" in German? Stopsemfromfloppin"

"What does an older woman have between her breast that a younger one doesnt? Her belly button."

"How many Nazis does it take to screw in 6 million lightbulbs? One. The rest were just following orders."

"Rats are under rated. Just check your dictionary."

"I heard that roles in leadership positions are good jobs... ...but tell that to Kim Jong Un, he's a dictator with a failing Korea"

"Waiter: If you know the food here is so lousy why do you keep coming back? Customer: It reminds me of my ex-wife's cooking."