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Joke of the Day
"What is the first symptom of AIDS? A pounding sensation in your ass."
Next Joke
"My girlfriend says I treat her like an object.. I don't know why it keeps saying that."
"The Past, the Present and the Future walk into a bar... It was *tense*."
"The steak pun... ...a rare medium, sometimes well done."
"You might want to read all of my tweets... so that when the movie comes out you can be all pompous and say the timeline was better."
"People who knock on my front door really need to give up these unrealistic expectations that I'm going to answer"
"Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address you turn the radio down?"
"What did the ghost say to the bee? Boo bee!"
"Yo momma is so fat Her toenails aren't painted, just redshifted"
"My 4 year old told me to just turn the tire around as the top part isn't flat. I don't care if it's wrong - that's still some great logic."