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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend says I treat her like an object.. I don't know why it keeps saying that."
Next Joke
"Two fish are in a tank One says to the other i'll man the guns you drive"
"Chuck Norris once went skydiving without a parachute, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough."
"What do you say to someone who studied media at university? Can I have fries with that please?"
"Is the volcano mean or nice? He was mean because he interrupts. (Courtesy of a family member - Benjamin)"
"The coolest thing about being a dog must be the ability to use your own ass for a pillow."
"The families in Eggo commercials live in nice houses and appear wealthy. Why are they always fighting over one shitty frozen waffle?"
"Why do greeting cards today all play songs & shit? Giving innocent folks migraines & whatnot. Go to hell, today's greeting cards!"
"[Phone rings] Babysitter: Hello? Dude: Dont. Go. Upstairs. Babysitter: Wha.. What's upstairs? Dude: NOT MUCH, STAIRS, WHAT'S UP WITH YOU"
"The secret to sustaining a happy marriage is to keep the mystery alive. So tonight I decided to clean something unexpectedly."