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Joke of the Day
"I tried wrapping all the presents this year But I just don't have the gift."
Next Joke
"They say: Dance like there's nobody watching, sing like there's nobody listening. But non of them are there to vouch for you when you end up in an insane asylum."
"The only wisdom that comes with age is knowing which stores have the nicer restrooms."
"Girls just wanna have Funds"
"Why is president Putin so hard to rape He won't stop putin up a fight."
"I told my boss 3 companies were after me and I needed a raise to stay at my present job. He asked which 3 companies were interested. I said gas, electric, and cable."
"What do you call a techno-themed grocery store? Gigi D'Agostino"
"Mall security asked me to empty my pockets. My response was ""you won't find a better job or respect in my pockets"""
"Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with Facebook."
"sick of bullshit dui checkpoint profiling just because i'm a white male with the jagermeister logo emblazoned across his truck windshield"